Navigating Pregnancy Announcements and Baby Questions While Battling Infertility
Infertility comes with enough emotional weight and then comes the awkward baby questions, unexpected pregnancy announcements, and the dreaded “When are you having kids?” conversations. If you’ve felt triggered, sad, or even angry in these moments, you are not alone. Here’s how to protect your peace, set boundaries, and give yourself permission to feel whatever comes up.
Why It’s Normal to Feel Mixed Emotions
Seeing others experience something you desperately want can feel painful. You might feel joy for them but also grief, frustration, or loneliness. All of this is valid; infertility brings out complex, often contradictory emotions. Be gentle with yourself. Looking for coping tips? These 8 coping techniques are a great place to start.
4 Practical Tips to Handle Pregnancy Announcements
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Mute, unfollow, or log off: It’s okay to take a social media break or mute accounts temporarily.
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Curate your feed: Follow accounts that feel supportive and uplifting to your fertility journey.
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Have a response ready: It’s perfectly fine to say “That’s exciting—right now we’re focusing on our own health journey.”
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Celebrate selectively: Give yourself permission to skip events or celebrations that might be emotionally difficult.
What to Say When People Ask, “When Are You Having Kids?”
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Short & sweet: “We’re working on it, thanks for checking in.”
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Redirect: “Actually, we’ve been really focused on [career, travel, health], what’s new with you?”
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Honest but firm: “It’s been a complicated road for us, and I’d prefer not to get into it right now.”
Protecting Your Mental Health During Infertility
Boundaries are self-care. If conversations or environments feel too overwhelming, it’s okay to say no, leave early, or reach out to a counselor or support group.
Your feelings are valid. You don’t have to be “strong” all the time or pretend things don’t hurt. Surround yourself with people who get it, set healthy boundaries, and most importantly, be kind to yourself.